Antarctica Ice Shelf

This expansive glacial plain runs off as far as the eye can see, only broken occasionally by canyons thousands of feet deep where the top layers have collapsed under ancient stresses. Subzero temperatures have kept this ice mass, thousands of feet thick and as wide as some small countries, frozen for millennia. It would be disturbingly easy to become lost out here and never found again, humans frozen where they fell from the unrelenting cold or, as a powerless Cybertronian might find himself, battered and broken at the bottom of some caved-in canyon of blue-white and various shades of grey ice.

A huge explosion of ice and rock shatters the grim silence of the Arctic morning. As the smoke clears, Bonecrusher emerges from the smoking crater. He points at the assembled demo team, most of whom were slected more for their skill at 'having been there when a volunteers were needed' then their actual demolition skills, and barks them down.

"LISTEN UP! Clear out the smoke and flame or it's gonna get hot for you! HOT LIKE THE FLAMES that you're supposed to put out, except they're gonna be burning you instead, yeah dig it?" He lifts one of them and shakes him to reinforce the situation. "Smooth out the base of the crater so we can place the turret foundation!"

And speaking of the turret pieces...Where the hell are they? Bonecrusher squints at Trypticon in the distance. The various parts of the anti air battery being assembled on location should have been here by now...

"WHAT?" Blueshift is annoyed at having been woken from whatever sleep he had found himself in. He points a finger at Bonecrusher angrily. "Bonecrusher, you don't tell me what to do! I'm a jet, and you're just an arm. AN ARM, Bonecrusher. I would be a better arm for Devastator, and once Galvatron approves my application, you'll be out of a job, so watch out Buckeroo Banzai." He looks around. "I think we should do MY plan instead, which is to smooth out the bottom of the crater to install a gun turret!"

Harrow is here to make sure no one bleeds out or gets charred /too/ badly, nothing more. Heavy-lifting is for Decepticon grunts. She stands rigidly outside of the explosion, chewing her lip and staring skywards. "Blueshift, he just said that!"

Backfire is here to make sure Harrow does her job, and to keep any likely suitors off her. With a metal baseball bat with spikes in it, if need be. "Yes Blueshift, he just said that!" he echoes her, standing with a hand on his hip and all full of sass.

Blast Off looks over at Blueshift, annoyed. "And what is WRONG with being an arm, Blueshift? At least we are part of something useful." He sniffs disdainfully, then gets back to work... sort of. Mostly he just crosses his arms and employs delay tactics. This is so BELOW him.... how he got stuck with such menial labor, he's still not quite sure. He THOUGHT this was supposed to have something to do with building weapons- not just demolition work to clear the place for them. It's the last time he listens to Bonecrusher, that's for sure.... "When do we get to the actual SKILLED LABOR part of this job, Bonecrusher? I thought I was building weapons, not performing grunt work. I'm scuffing my heat shields as it is. Do you know how HARD they are to clean?" He looks over and sees Backfire, shakes his head, still confused by his odd behavior recently- and chooses to keep ignoring him.

"That's right pretty boy, keep your optics to yourself!" Backfire shouts at Blast Off, thinking he's checking out Harrow.

Bonecrusher shakes a set of instructions labeled KARLSTAD ANTI AIRCRAFT BATTERY ASSEMBLY in Blast Off's face. "As soon as the parts arrive, we'll start at step one, DIG IT?!"

A particularly cocky member of the demo team, a medic Seeker named Turbulance saddles up to Harrow as the other members of his team begin prepping the foundations in the crater. "So...we're both medical Seekers, eh? You come around Trypticon often?"

Blueshift rolls his eyes at Blast Off. "No Blast Off, you're not an arm, you're a spaceship like me. We're almost brothers, don't turn on me here." He then gets his laser sword out and waves it at Harrow and Backfire. "I thought you two traitors would try and ferment rebellion against me. No, Bonecrusher wanted to make the crater into a foundation for tourettes sufferers. It is my idea to use it as the foundation for a turret."

Harrow levels an icy glare on Backfire, as that's all she can do about him. There is no reasoning with him. So she shuffles /away/ from him only to run into Turbulance. "Med... Medical seeker? I knew it, they're trying to replace me!" Turbulance is threatened with a sharp end of her toolkit. "The first mech down is /mine/."

Backfire immediately rushes over and punches Turbulance in the face. The result of which is undetermined, as he's about as strong as Harrow is. "Not anymore she doesn't!" he shouts, snagging her arm and attempting to pull her over towards Blueshift. "Here, help Blueshift with something.. I trust him."

Then he's off again, moving towards Bonecrusher. "Okay, so what do we have to do? I'm confused. Are we ice sculpting gun cannons? That'd be cool, because ice beats fire.. right??"

Backfire may be weak as a baby, but Blueshift has insane min-max twink-strength. "WHAT THE?" he shouts as Backfire attacks Turbulance. Perhaps Backfire has shown his true traitor colours? Or wait - no! Backfire proved himself to be loyal, so Turbulance must be the traitor. "DIE, TRAITOR!" Blueshift screams, waving his sword to try and cleave Turbulance in half vertically

Blast Off blinks as instructions are waved in his face. He hmphs softly. "Well, about time, then. I intend to DIG nothing, however. Are the parts coming soon, then? This is taking quite some time. What did you do, get a tank to deliver it?" He then glances over at Blueshift. Actually, he makes a good point. Blast Off does consider fellow space ships generally superior to all other mechs unable to break planetary orbit. But Bonecrusher is a fellow Combiner arm... now the Combaticon is torn. For a moment. No, spaceships win every time. "I already have "brothers", but.... very well. I still have no idea what most of you are talking about however. Nor do I want to." He means it, as he steps away to avoid Backfire's and Blueshift's screaming attack on Turbulance.

"Hey now Harrow, I'm not trying to replace you, but may you and me could team-AHHHHHHH MY BEAUTIFUL FACE!" Turbulance gets knocked into the air by Backfire's punch like he's being set up for Marvel vs. Capcom combos and then Blueshift slices him in half. Energon and robot guts spray all over everyone. Two big Turbulance pieces hit the ground beside Harrow, and he reaches his arms out to her. "This...was always meant to be...fix...me..."

 Meanwhile, Bonecrusher just stares for a long time at Backfire for a really lone time, and then tilts to look over the Seeker's shoulder to see if the turret is being delivered yet.

"DON'T WORRY!" Blueshift looks around at Backfire and Harrow. "I am going to hollow him out and wear him as a suit so I can infiltrate this network of traitors and uncover the other ones." He starts to pull out Turbulance's insides so he can wear him

Aaaand down goes Turbulance. Harrow stares at the two pieces that Blueshift promptly dons, then gazes into the fire. Oh well, seekers are terribly replacable. "Aren't you guys supposed to be stamping that out?"

<Decepticon> Impudent Fool Backfire says, "Inform Command that the designation 'Turbulance' is open for use, again."

<Decepticon> Blueshift says, "NOT YET BACKFIRE"

<Decepticon> Blueshift says, "SHHHHH"

<Decepticon> Harrow says, "No one is doing their job. The longer you mechs dick around the longer we'll be out here!"

<Decepticon> Blueshift says, "PRIMUS Harrow, language! What's wrong with you, that is inappropriate behaviour"

<Decepticon> Blueshift says, "Now help me hollow out this head"

<Decepticon> Polarity says, "Since when did we care about appropriate language?"

<Decepticon> Harrow says, "Blueshift, do as Bonecrusher says!"

<Decepticon> Harrow says, "You can hollow out heads later!"

<Decepticon> Blueshift says, "Harrow, did I not just save your life from a traitor?"

<Decepticon> Blueshift says, "A little bit of gratitude would be appreciated"

<Decepticon> Polarity says, "Yer not on her operating table, I'd say that's gratitude!"

<Decepticon> Harrow ...can't tell if that's an insult.

<Decepticon> Blueshift says, "Pardon? Sorry I didn't understand that"

<Decepticon> Scourge says, "Blueshift, your prattle is tiresome, as Harrow says, do as Bonecrusher says."

<Decepticon> Blueshift says, "B-but I just defeated a traitor, Scourge"

<Decepticon> Blueshift says, "Ask Backfire"

Blast Off just stares as the Seekers murder Turbulance, shakes his head, and gets back to non-work. At least for a moment. Then Harrow points out via radio that the longer they dick around, the longer they will be stuck here... stuck here with these idiots, he thinks. Ok, that's enough motivation for him to work, then. He calls to Harrow and the others: "I suppose *I* can do the work that these dolts seem unable to, then...." The shuttle moves over to the fire and begins spraying a hose, trying to put the flames out. His heat shields allow him to get quite close to the flames without discomfort.

<Decepticon> Polarity says, "What'd you do Blue, shoot your reflection in a mirror? Hah!"

<Decepticon> Blueshift says, "Don't be ridiculous, Polarity"

Turbulance just screams in pain. It's really loud and unrelenting. Finally, he finds the focus to look Blueshift in the eyes, gasping as he speaks. "But...if you kill me...yo...you'll never know who the traitor is!"

<Decepticon> Blueshift says, "I have not yet found a laser strong enough to penetrate the mirror to kill MIRROR BLUESHIFT"

Bonecrusher throws his hands up in the air as several Sweeps arrive, floying through the sky and towing various Turret parts. "FINALLY! No wonder it took so long, you morons probably had to do your nails!"

Blueshift leaves Turbulance's head alone for a moment, hollowing out the rest of the seeker's body and pulling it on like a coat. He shakes the head in his hands like a magic 8 ball. "TELL ME!" he yells. "WHO IS THE TRAITOR?"

<Decepticon> Blast Off says, "*sighs* I'm surrounded by idiots here. Except for you, Harrow. I think."

<Decepticon> Blueshift says, "HAH I know, right?"

<Decepticon> Blast Off says, "....."

<Decepticon> Harrow says, "..."

"I CANNOT BELIEVE I have to do GRUNT WORK!" Harrow exclaims, lifting her hands and dropping them in exasperation as she stalks out into the crater with Blast Off. She whips out her ice pistol to take care of her half of the flames.

<Decepticon> Polarity says, "Have you ever tried just turning the mirror around?"

<Decepticon> Blueshift says, "No, that is where the hook is"

Turbulance spits energon and fluid everywhere as he's shaken. Most of his lands on Blueshift. Finally, he gets out the words.

 "H...Harrow! You...you were right the whole time that Backfire stuff was happening! She...She buried Galvatron somewhere deep inside Cybertron!"

"WHAT?" Blueshift waves the head in the direction of Harrow. "HARROW did you hear what Turbulance just admitted!" He is now wearing all of Turbulance apart from the head, and he stalks towards Harrow looking a bit ... horrid. "Is what this head said true?"

Blast Off nods to Harrow. At least SOME of them are competent and can get this done and over with. Blast Off wants to be on Cybertron, blasting Autofools, or back at the Combaticon base, reading quietly in his Silo, or out in space, exploring the galaxy... pretty much anywhere but here on a giant ice shelf with Cons whose last names end in "Shift" or "Fire". He sprays out more of the flames and smoke, his heat shields providing protection as he steps among the combustion. "There, I believe that does it," He tells Bonecrusher and Harrow. He just ignores Backfire and Blueshift.

Harrow can't quite ignore the pair, alas. "I /WHAT/?" She whirls around. "He's lying! All lies! I have no idea where Galvatron is! ...H-hail Galvatron!"

Backfire gives Blast Off an evil stare, stomping forward with a finger held out pointing at him accusingly. "I'll tell you something, buddy!" It's unfortunate, he won't get the chance to.

Suddenly, a Seeker sized hole cracks underneath him and he plummets downward. "Nooooooooooooooooooooooo.." his voice echoes upward.

Blueshift points at the head. "Come on Harrow, heads dont lie"

Turbulance vomits and deactivates.

<Decepticon> Harrow says, "Why hasn't Blueshift been executed yet! I put in numerous requests! I've offered amazing rewards! Come on people!"

<Decepticon> Scourge says, "I have been informed that his continued existence is owed to something the humans refer to as 'red tape'."

Bonecrusher gives Blast Off a big thumbs up as Sweeps start landing the turret parts. He holds up the instructions. "Ok, step 1..." And then an icy blast of wind from the chasm Backfire fell into blows the pages out of the Constructicon's hand and they scatter everywhere.

Blast Off just... stares some more at the Backfire-sized hole, shakes his head, and goes back to finishing his work. The Combaticon stands among the remaining billowing smoke, his browns and gray blending in with the gray of the smoke. He notices Bonecrusher give him a thumbs-up and nods. FINALLY. Now they can get this done-WAAAIT. Instructions go flying everywhere. The shuttle faceplatepalms.

Blueshift looks down at the deactivated head in his hands. "Hmmm. Maybe we could USE THIS IN THE TURRET"

The sweeps are too busy examining their nails to respond to Bonecrusher at first. One has begun to nibble on a piece of the cannon. When the papers scatter, they flock like bats to try and catch them.

Harrow leers at Blueshift. So long as he doesn't try to apprehend her or something. "The pages! ...Well you're a Constructicon, Bonecrusher, I'm sure you've put together a million of these things."

Blueshift shakes his head in disgust at Harrow's lazyness. He gets out a pad of paper and a green crayon and begins to scribble. "Don't worry, I will design some new plans to replace the old ones."

Bonecrusher stares at Harrow. "Yup." With other Cosntructicons present.

He stares at the pile of parts. "So......"

Blast Off agrees with Harrow. "Indeed. Time to live up to your name, Constructicon. " He pauses. "PLEASE tell me you can live up to your name..." But Bonecrusher appears to know what he's doing, so... all is well, right? Right? The Combaticon looks up into the sky, wondering how long before he can take off again. Then back to the turret parts. "Well, doesn't THAT part go with THAT one?" He points.

Blueshift hands Bonecrusher his hastily scribbled notes. "There. Job done!"

nods at Blast Off. "Yup. You're right." He glances at Blueshift's notes, which is just a drawing of a shark with a cat's head eating Swerve. "Yeah, put that round part at the bottom over there."

Bonecrusher nods at Blast Off. "Yup. You're right." He glances at Blueshift's notes, which is just a drawing of a shark with a cat's head eating Swerve. "Yeah, put that round part at the bottom over there."

Blueshift rolls up his sleeves (which are the arms of Turbulance) and uses his stupidly high strength to get to work assembling the turret. Blueshift has no construction experience at all. His tech is crap. This will not end well

Harrow has resigned to watch now. It might be amusing. Though she does help occasionally, by kicking some seals and penguins out of the way.

Blast Off nods in acknowledgement. Normally he is in no rush to do such menial labor, but the sooner they're done, the better, so... He starts to get to work. The Combaticon is the opposite of Blueshift- not much physical strength, but high technical skill. He struggles with a few of the heavier parts, trying not to let that difficulty actually show, before deciding to handle smaller parts only. He glares at Blueshift and his bizarre arms. "No, not THAT way... THAT needs to go OVER THERE, see?" He points again.

Unfortunately Blueshift is mean as well as selfish, so he completely ignores Blast Off, and in fact does exactly the opposite of what the Combaticon suggests. "I think I know how to put a turret together! Huh!" He rolls his eyes as he moves in a very large piece, before dusting his hands off and stepping back. "There, we didn't need the instructions, did we?"

The thing Blueshift has put together looks INCREDIBLY RUDE

Bonecrusher shouts in alarm. "Blueshift, that's live ordinance!"

"EXPLOSIVES ARMED." Announces the ordinance, because sure.

Blueshift bangs on the side of the turret's mighty shaft. "It's FINE, Bonecrusher", he shouts back, before lighting up an enercig.

Blast Off faceplatepalms again before edging slightly away from Blueshift... like...I don't really know this mech..... and then the ordinance speaks. Blast Off leaps back once Blueshift starts banging on the ordinance. Well, looks like he might be taking that space flight soon, after all.... he prepares to make a hasty departure as he makes his way to the outer perimeter.

Famed Decepticon explosion detector Gonnablow stands up straight, seemingly taller than the rest of the gathered Cons as his moment arrives. "Decepticons, run! That shell is...going to explode!"

Harrow doesn't ask questions, she just grabs her toolkit and springs into the air. Maybe Blueshift will finally die.

Blast Off doesn't need to be told twice. He transforms into space shuttle mode. In his extremely fast shuttle mode, he should be able to outrun most of anything. The others, well.... they might be outta luck.

Blueshift makes absolutley no motion to move. Instead he leans back against the turret. "I think I did a marvellous job there!" he exclaims. "Maybe I'm the secret seventh Constructicon. I mean, that sort of thing CAN happen."

<Decepticon> Blueshift says, "Harrow, am I the secret seventh Constructicon?"

<Decepticon> Harrow says, "Sure champ."

<Decepticon> Blast Off says, "Yes, let him die happy."

<Decepticon> Blast Off says, "It's only humane."

Bonecrusher also transforms and dozes away. Very slowly. Because he's a bulldozer.

 "TOOT TOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOT"

<Decepticon> Blueshift says, "I knew it!"

The sweeps swarm and take to the skies to circle like vultures over Blueshift.

HUGE EXPLOSION

Blueshift staggers out of the explosion, face covered in soot. "I'll get you next time, Bonecrusher!" he shouts

<Decepticon> Spinister says, "..."

<Decepticon> Polarity says, "You people are nuts. As usual"

<Decepticon> Harrow says, "Frag, he's not dead."

<Decepticon> Blueshift says, "Who, Turbulance? No Harrow, don't worry, he is dead"

<Decepticon> Blueshift says, "You are safe"

<Decepticon> Blueshift says, "Maybe I will fix him with my Constructicon powers"

<Decepticon> Harrow says, "Ugh!"

<Decepticon> Blueshift says, "Hey, Harrow"

<Decepticon> Blueshift says, "Energon keeps leaking out of my eyes. That's normal, right?"

<Decepticon> Harrow says, "...Yes that's very normal."

<Decepticon> Blueshift says, "Okay, good"

<Decepticon> Harrow says, "No wait - ! It means you have a terrible disease! Command, Blueshift must be quarantined!!"

<Decepticon> Blueshift says, "Hmm, perhaps you are right Harrow"

<Decepticon> Blueshift says, "I will report to medbay for quarantining"

<Decepticon> Blueshift says, "I think we blew up the quarantine bay, so I'll use your office"

<Decepticon> Polarity says, "And that's my cue to go on patrol before someone remembers I have forcefields. ZOOOM!"

<Decepticon> Harrow says, "I don't know what we expected when Bonecrusher organized the construction."

<Decepticon> Polarity says, "Because the dude has 'construct' in his group name?"

<Decepticon> Harrow says, "You'd think that would help."

<Decepticon> Blast Off says, "Exactly. I expected a Constructicon to actually know something about construction. I ...should have known better."

<Decepticon> Harrow says, "...Polarity! Put up a forcefield around my office."

<Decepticon> Blast Off says, "At least some of us actually live up to our names. We Combaticons, for instance. No one knows the intricate details, manuevers, and strategies of combat better than we."